PCL recovery

Hopefully when this shapes up into something, it will help other people going through a similar surgery... not much out there on PCL's, and I think there should be.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Frustrations

Just need to vent a bit. I am so frustrated with people not understanding, with basically being a prisoner in my home. Every day, people ask me if I'm walking yet. I tell them over and over again that I won't be walking for a while, that this is not the type of surgery that you are better the next day. It doesn't help that the only other people in my life that had knee surgery had meniscus surgeries which are relatively easy, they're walking 2 days later. Nobody seems to get that I will have to wear this stupid brace for a long time, that I won't just wake up one day and miraculously be better, that it's a process I have to go through with PT. I viewed getting my stitches out as a big step, and then people ask me why it's better. It's better because now I don't have that insane itching/burning that the stitches were causing!

And I want to get out of the house, but it's hard. I live on the second floor and I'm not comfortable taking the stairs by myself, especially going up. A lot of the time, by the time I go back inside to go up the stairs, I can't even take them with the crutches, I end up scooting up on my backside, and then using a chair to pull myself up. But I need someone to bring the chair to the landing and hold it so I can scoot up. The problem is, people work during  the day, so I'm basically stuck at home, I feel like I'm trapped. I did go outside yesterday with my dad, I made it to the end of the block and back, but with lots of stops in between and it took me a long time. I almost wanted to break down and cry because I'm just not used to it. I'm usually very active, always on the go. And now I can barely hobble to the end of the block. I just want to fast forward to 4 months from now when hopefully everything would be better.

Sorry for venting, just having a bad day. I thought things were going better until today when I woke up to a leg that was more swollen than it was after the surgery, and a very painful knee. It's calmed down now, but still very annoying. And then the scarf  I was trying to knit to keep myself occupied got all tangled, and in the mornings when I first get up, I always almost forget that I'm not allowed to put weight on my leg. It's when I bring my legs over the side of the bed and step on my crutches that I remember I'm not supposed to bear weight, but in the morning before I eat breakfast and have my coffee, it's very difficult to use crutches properly. I end up slipping all over the place because I'm still half asleep and I just don't function well before my coffee! But actually getting to the kitchen so I can make my coffee is like fighting a battle in it of itself. Grrrr

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